Jeremy Love reviews the Essential Luke Cage Vol. 1

Stolen from the V forum

ESSENTIAL LUKE CAGE Volume One

SWEET CHRISTMAS, this was the shiznit! Dodgy drawing, hilarious fake slang but one story sold me on the whole affair LUKE CAGE vs. DOCTOR DOOM.

I declare LUKE CAGE: HERO FOR HIRE issues 19 and 20 to be the GREATEST COMIC BOOK EVER created.

In case you don't believe me I will describe the story for you ( SPOILERS OF COURSE ):

Doom hires Cage to find some of his missing robots, so he does and Doom fails to pay him the 200 fucking dollars he charged for the job. Cage says (exact quote): "That's how you play it, Doom? You Motherless son of a Witch, you'll find out how LUKE CAGE plays it! I'm comin' for you, Doom! Someway, Somehow, Luke Cae is gonna NAIL YOU TO THE WALL!" (keep in mind, this is for 200 bucks)

So Cage crashes into the Fantastic Four building to ask Reed to borrow a FUCKING ROCKET to fly to Latveria to get his 200 bucks. Of course he has to whup the entire FF's ass before they calm down for long enough to talk.

Reed, "Good Lord! He dropped Ben in his tracks!" Cage (to Thing) , "I need Reed, not you-- So sit easy while I run my rap..." and then he pops Ben Grim upside the head.

He asks Reed to borrow the ROcket and Johnny Storm tells him "The Subway's right around the corner Pal, and if you're looking for some spare change..." Revelation: Johnny Storm is a racist prick! I knew it!

So that Medusa chick and Reed smile and say they totally admire Cage's "spunk" in that condescending whitey way and let him borrow the rocket.

So Cage goes to Latveria teams up with the "Faceless One" who's leading a ROBOT REVOLUTION, busts up in Dooms castle and Doom says (EXACT DIALOGUE FROM THE COMIC): "When my men reported a crazy BLACK (emphasis NOT mine) man in the Fantastic Four's craft, I knew it had to be you"

So Cage starts punching Doom in the gut repeatedly. Cage reveals Doom's fatal flaw "Negro Underestimation" apparently Doom's armor cant withstand repeated stress on a solitary point and it damages all of Doom's circuitry, rendering Doom useless. He admires Cage because no one's ever thought of that before ( I guess it makes sense that Reed Richards never thought to just punch the guy).

So Doom gives Cage his props and is about to give him his 200 bucks when the FACELESS ONE shows up again. His big plan was not a Robot Revolution, but he wanted to kill Doom. But "Murder's a Gig I don't take kindly too" says Cage teams up with Doom to whup the faceless one's ass cuz he'll be damned if Doom is killed before he gets his 200 bucks.

So they kick the Faceless One's ass, Cage gets his 200 bucks and flies home. The caption reads (again WORD FOR WORD): "Stoicly Cage counts through the crisp green bills until $200 grows in the palm of his hand, after that he simply silently turns away"

Ben Grimm is pissed because Cage helped Doom stop the Robot revolution (which Doom gets total credit for in the newspapers) and Cage won't tell them the details. So Cage says "I'm tired ####, I'm going home to take a shower" and gets in a cab $200 richer.

This was the most fun I've had reading a comic in a long time. The way Cage just strolls through the entire story with his fist balled up, staying cool and kicking ass was just fucking awesome. Everybody undersestimated him, but he got the job done anyway. The interaction between Cage and Doom is priceless. I can't believe this was actually published.

Guess what I want for my birthday?
Classified under: reviews, Jeremy Love, comics, Luke Cage